This morning,
I’ve been thinking about my faith.

Not my faith in God
—that faith,
although I wish it were stronger most days,
is steady and still growing.

That’s not the faith
that’s worrying
me today.

It’s my faith in people.

My faith
in someone in particular
is dwindling,
and it hurts.

I know
we’re all just human,
all flawed
—but I think sometimes,
especially
the men in my life,
forget
that as the
feminine species,
I’m sensitive.

I want to be looked after.

Not just
financially,
that's the easy part.

When I’m
examining a potential mate,
I don’t just watch
how he treats me
—I watch how
he treats women
in general.

I’m not sitting around
waiting for a promise
that he’ll hold
me higher
than every other
woman on earth.

Of course,
I want my man
to love
and admire me
differently
—but I’ve always
wanted a man
who respected all women.

Because,
if he respects
all women,
he’s not out here cheating
—that’s disrespectful.

He’s not
attempting
misleading women
into sexual relationships
(only little girls get tricked into having sex🤷🏾‍♀️)
—he understands
the value of full,
mutual consent.

Out of respect for her body.

You get what I’m putting down.

So yeah…
my faith is being tested
in a big way
right now.

And I’m trying to figure out what to do with that.